Dear Brazil,
Is it okay if I call you that? I don’t know your name but I’ve been watching you for awhile. Don’t worry I can’t see who you are or anything. That would be totally creepy and unsettling. What I mean is that I’ve seen that you’ve stopped by my blog several times. I only know that because this new blog contraption shows me a map of the world and when someone visits, that country lights up on the map. For the last three days in a row, you’ve come to see me! You show up in the form of a little number one and a yellow Brazil on my very neutral map.
It’s really pretty, that chunk of yellow on that big lonely world. I’m writing to you today because I thought you should know that I see you and you’re awesome.
Obviously when I first noticed you from across the internet, I assumed there was some sort of mistake. I don’t know anyone in Brazil. To be honest I don’t know much about Brazil at all. Then I got to thinking that perhaps I do know someone in Brazil, and just don’t realize it. Maybe I have a well traveled friend who happened to check in on me via the interwebs while away on vacation. I’ve asked everyone I know about the traveler possibility, and as far as I can tell, you are indeed a stranger. But in the best possible way of course!
Even though we’ve never met, you’ve already taught me many things. Confession: I’ve talked to Google about you. Also the CIA. Well kind of. I accidentally found an impressive library of info about Brazil that I was startled to discover is actually published by the CIA. There’s a possibility that I’m now being watched by creepy federal hit men, but I’m only slightly concerned about that right now.
If you’re a federal hit man and you’re reading this, before you kill me or take me to a dungeon for tea and questioning, be a dear and put your email info into that box on the left. Really though, you don’t need to question me. I’m not that interesting and I don’t know anyone with any death wishes. All my friends are extremely cool, especially my new friend Brazil. Also you should know that I cuss like a nurse when I’m startled so you should gird your eardrums.
Should I mysteriously disappear for some unknown reason, someone please tell my family I love them. You’re worth it Brazil!
Anyway back to that CIA library. It’s full of factoids about your country. It has stats about how many doctors there are, how many people have things like water, obesity, and education. It even shows how your country ranks in the world. I assume that last one is the type of thing used strictly by angry politicians to befuddle the public during campaign rallies, but what do I know. I do know one thing for sure: you must have internet access, because that’s how we met!
I have a few theories about you, Brazil. Would you like to hear them?
Okay, so when I first saw you, in that yellowed in section of South America, I immediately imagined that you live in a George of the Jungle type tree house. But then there’s the internet thing, which probably wouldn’t come standard in a jungle abode. So I started imagining you on a massive flamboyant Carnival float instead, like the birds in that movie Rio. In the Carnival version, you’re big on feathers and you have impressive rhythm. Do you sing at all? Never mind that’s not important. Please don’t be offended by my ignorance and my movie stereotyping. I’m really just trying to bedazzle the blank spots in my mind where you facelessly reside. It’s what I do with the things I don’t know. I throw glitter at them! It’s much more satisfying than sitting around feeling ignorant.
There’s still the possibility that you don’t actually exist at all outside of my head. If that’s the case, I’ve decided I’m okay with it; I’ve had a blast with you anyway. I’ve learned a few factoids about Brazil, and I might get a new subscriber or two out of the hoards of CIA hit men (or hit women?) I accidentally poked with my web browser. So you see, dear Brazil, you and I are already friends. You provide me with endless imaginings, and lots of questions, and I provide you with… well I haven’t actually worked that part out yet. Maybe if you stop by again you can tell me what you get out of our budding relationship. Unless of course you’re imaginary in which case I’ll just take some medication and pretend this never happened.
Whether your visits have been repeated mistakes, the accidental bouncings of a wayward web browser, or even the fault of some brilliant rogue keyboard, I’m sending lots of love your way today. This waiting and wondering reminds me of childhood Christmas anticipation, and if it weren’t for your vague cyber signals, I wouldn’t have that right now. So thank you Brazil! You have improved my day, many times over, and given my flighty brain something to ponder when the day’s tasks get a little too real.
Dreaming of Brazil in a very non-stalkerish, let’s be friends kind of way,
The Glittery Nurse
P.S. I see you too Italy and UK! *waving furiously* Welcome!
